| LEAD PLAYERS |
| Changing mouthpiece mid song | $15 |
| Missing high lick, then mentioning previous gig(s) that day | $25 |
| Faking section into early entrance | $25 |
| Faking self into early entrance | $50 |
| Asking Conductor if it's OK to take this lick up | $50 |
| Asking Conductor if it's OK to take this lick down | $100 |
| Taking lick down on gig that you took up in rehearsal | $100 |
| Missing last note of "In the Mood" | $230 |
| NON-LEAD PLAYERS |
| Hanging over past lead player on last cord | $50 |
| Attempting unassigned high lick lead player biffs | $75 |
| Asking lead player what mouthpiece he uses | $75 |
| Attempting to out-screech lead player on last cord | $125 |
| Successfully out-screeching lead player at any time | $500 |
| CRIMINAL BAD TASTE |
| Quoting Herb Albert or Chuck Mangione song | $25 |
| Continuously asking "where are we?" | $25 |
| Talking about a great deal on a new horn | $25 |
| Hawking old horn on bandstand | $25 |
| Having a nicer gig bag than the rest of section | $50 |
| Beginning sentence with "When I played for Kenton.." | $250 |
| BASIC STUPIDITY |
| Drunkenness on gig | $25 |
| Stoned ness on gig | $50 |
| Sobriety on gig | $75 |
| Sitting next to conductor at pre/post-gig meal | $130 |
| Pretending to be friends with Bone players | $25 |
| Actually being friends with Bone players | $50 |
| Dating Bone player | $75 |
| Loaning money to Bone player | amount loaned |
| Wearing old Maynard Ferguson tour shirt | $50 |
| Wearing new Maynard Ferguson tour shirt | $325 |
| MISC. |
| Vibrato on unison passage | $25 |
| Obnoxiously show-offy warm up | $35 |
| Playing highest note possible during warm up | $40 |
| Taking tuning note up octave | $50 |
| Playing B-flat when band tunes on A | $75 |
| Blacking out after high note | $100 |
| Being told by conductor to play louder | $250 |
| Dropping mute | $25 |
| Dropping horn ----- cost of repair plus ----- | $50 |
| Dropping dead | warning |
| Blaming mistake on sticky valve | $150 |
| Sound checking section mic with obnoxious jazz licks | $50 |
| Raising hand after making mistake | $25 |
| Practicing multiple-tonguing not called for on gig | $50 |
| Failure to Swing | $1,000 |
