ALIAS: TSTS Wanted for dumping toxic waste... from a spit valve.
	ALIAS: FLATTOP Wanted in connection with the unauthorized use of written dynamics.
	ALIAS: AXEL Wanted for public drunkeness and disorderly conduct. May be in possession of multiple beers at once. Use caution.
	ALIAS: MILK CHOCOLATE Wanted for playing 'pp' in the street.
	ALIAS: BIG MAC Wanted for 3 counts of bugle-ary.