As seen on the bathroom wall in cell block 4...

15 Reasons Why A Beer Is Better Than A Woman

1. A beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer
2. When you go to a bar you know you can always pick up a beer
3. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have beer on your breath
4. You don't have to wine and dine a beer
5. If you pour a beer right you'll always get good head
6. Hangovers go away
7. When you're finished with a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents
8. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good
9. A beer always goes down easy
10. You can share a beer with your friends
11. Beer is always wet
12. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer
13. A frigid beer is a good beer
14. You can have more than one beer and not feel guilty
15. You can enjoy a beer all month long