ALIAS: CAGY Wanted on twin counts of forging a key signature and holding a fermata against its will.

ALIAS: WALLY Wanted on 5 counts of fingering his instrument in public.

ALIAS: BEBOP Wanted on suspicion of frenching a french horn.

ALIAS: MUFF Wanted for exposing himself to an innocent instrument. Use extreme caution and keep your instruments on hand and locked up.

ALIAS: BONER Wanted for attempting to drink a circle of fifths.